Help dealing with family that are in denial about my son's health

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Venomlady posted on Thu, Jul 22 2010 9:14 PM

At 2 yrs old my son showed symptoms that concerned me & my mom so we asked for his pediatrician to do some tests.. we had a 3 hour glucose tolerance test done and his results were not so great but not high enough to be diagnosed diabetic.. his doctor suggested we control his diet and so we did and have continued to do so to this day.. Mason (my son) is now 9 yrs old and within the last few months his blood glucose lvls started going up & down for no reason so we took him to have bloodwork done again and the results are that he will be diabetic. 2 weeks ago he seen a Peds Endo for the first time, they suggested we stay on the diet that he has been on since he was 2 and they said that Mason will probly be on insulin within 6 months to a year. Unlike most parents, I am not in shock, ive know this was possible since my son was little but my problem lies in Mason's father's side of the family. They have always fought with me about this health issue and now that im trying to make them understand that it is even more important that they follow our instructions they act like we are making all of this up or something. The Endo told us that we are very lucky to know early what is going on because most people dont find out until they are very sick. He said Mason is Pre-Diabetic. I dont know how to make Mason's father & grandma understand when she tries to tell us there is no such thing as pre-diabetic, you are either diabetic or not. Any Advice????

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jen1229 replied on Fri, Jul 23 2010 6:41 AM

How about a joint doctor appointment where the doctor can explain to them about pre-diabetes and the need to follow the instructions you give them.  The only other option is to not let him visit them unless you are present.  His health is at stake here and they can't be allowed to make him sick.

Jen  - LevemirConfused and Novalog Wink A1c 5.8

 

 

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Julia replied on Fri, Jul 23 2010 6:51 PM

The health professionals who taught me about diabetes also do not believe there is such a thing as pre-diabetes.  They would call it "diet-controlled diabetes."  There is alot of confusion and disagreement about terminology.

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Julia replied on Fri, Jul 23 2010 6:52 PM

Anyway, I don't think it is a problem if they want to call your son diabetic, as long as they follow the doctor's instructions.

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I guess we were kind of lucky in that my youngest daughter became a Type 1 diabetic at age 14.   Part of the indoctrination was the meddling family syndrome.  Seems like you have it; but at the end of the day; you and your husband need to remain in charge and have to do the hard things that grandparents are not forced to deal with as they sometimes are not always around.

Personally, for me it is what the doctor said needed to be done and that was that.  If you are the primary DM caregiver, then exert your authority and have no guilt about it.

Steve

 

 

 

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Debbie replied on Mon, Jul 26 2010 4:35 PM

I spoke to one of our pediatric endocrinologists about your question.  He said that in most circumstances diabetes is treated once blood glucose values confirm inadequate insulin production.  Your son's pediatric endocrinologist should help establish a plan for monitoring your son so that if he requires insulin that it can be started in a safe and timely manner.  “Pre-diabetes” is a term related to the future development of type 2 diabetes which is rarely diagnosed in a 2-year old child, but your son's pediatric endocrinologist should be the person that establishes your son's diagnosis and appropriate treatment plan.  It is very important to detect diabetes as early as possible.  Perhaps you would like your son's father and your son's grandmother to go to his next appointment with the pediatric endocrinologist?  Good luck!

 

-Debbie Butler, LICSW, CDE

Joslin Moderator

 

 

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My soon to be ex son-in-law REFUSES to follow diety rules for my pre-diabetic 14 year old grandgirl..

It is a huge probem....SUGAR is a way of life to his TENN family..and he has the kids half time. HUGE problem

 

 

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dietary..

typo

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jen1229 replied on Wed, Jul 28 2010 8:11 AM

it seems to me that she would have some recourse in family court. if he can't be trusted to kep the child healthy by seeing that she eats right, then he should not have unsupervised (by someone well versed in diabetes care) visits.  

Jen  - LevemirConfused and Novalog Wink A1c 5.8

 

 

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thanks for all the information =)  i have decided not to let him go back to their house.. she told me today that she does not believe that Mason has anything wrong with him and she thinks we are TRYING to make him be sick when he really isnt. that REALLY made me furious ... that is why she wouldnt follow the instructions for monitoring his sugar or follow his diet as ordered by Mason's doctors. No mother wishes for their child to be unhealthy or sick and i have prayed for him to be OK and not have any problems but even still He does have ADD and his Pancrease isnt working right and until she follows the instructions from the doctors He will not be allowed back at her house... i also told her i WANTED her to attend his next appointment so his doctor could tell her how serious this issue really is. Mason's health is TOP PRIORITY and he will be taken care of correctly!!! and that was my final word. Thanks to all of you for your replies =)

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jen1229 replied on Fri, Aug 6 2010 7:18 AM

Good for you. 

Jen  - LevemirConfused and Novalog Wink A1c 5.8

 

 

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